It feels like a war of betrayal, but the kind that lives within and consists of two opposing versions of yourself. This piece explores the relationship between the person I sacrificed being and the version I chose to become. Between an internal battle of two personal identities. An artist and a mother. I convinced myself that in order to survive, succeed, and be acceptable, I needed to shape-shift into a version that was smaller, contained; domestic.

But deep down, the parts of me that were once soft, curious, wild, and free never died. They simply waited. And eventually, it began to ache. I began to feel like a stranger in my own skin. Yearning for a version of myself I thought I was happy leaving behind. Now I feel torn, split. Who do I choose? The visionary artist who was meant for more or the self-sacrificing mother who believed she had to shrink to survive? I’m at war.